[nh] #7 — introvert or extrovert?





this edition of the [no hustle] huddle went out on Monday 31st July 2023

Maybe you can relate to what I’m about to share… maybe not.

Either way, taking some time to *think* about this is important, for both you and some of those you care about in your life.

Let me explain …

Last week, I went to a music festival. It was very wet (VERY wet!!), which spoiled some of the fun but didn’t stop me from getting my groove on.

I love music, and a previous version of me practically lived at gigs. That’s no longer the case, as I have less time for them in my current chapter of life. And so, I’m rather out of practice, which may sound strange because why would I need to practice going to music gigs/festivals?

Because I’m an introvert. I am someone who doesn’t get filled up from being around others. In fact, it does the opposite to me. It drains me. Places me in a state of panic. I’ve always felt this way. Even when I used to attend gigs two, three, and four times a week. 

But I found it easier back then because I placed myself in the situation more often. And as is the case, practice makes perfect (well, not perfect, but it makes it easier).

Rewind to a week ago and I felt very low and very drained. An entire weekend of PEOPLE, on the back of a few busy months where I’ve not given myself the gift of enough ME time. I felt fractured. I still do, as I write this, the tremors rumbling beneath the surface. Maybe you can relate, you too an introvert and/or someone who struggles with social anxiety.

Then again, maybe this all sounds strange…

Either way, it’s important to step back and think about the whole Introvert vs Extrovert paradox—and the grey area in-between because nobody fits nicely into one camp or the other. You are an essential piece of this equation. Yet so are others around you; your colleagues, team members, friends, family…

We need to walk with empathy, appreciating our and others’ differences, and how what fills us up has the opposite effect on another — and how even though something someone loves (ie: me and music festivals) can still fracture their world.

I have a little exercise for you at the end of this email to help you better connect with yourself and those around you (as well as an important question)… but first here’s some of the best content I’ve found this week that I hope inspires you ?

from the [no hustle] community

5 Lessons From “Stillness is The Key”Introvert or not, I feel we can all take value from better learning about the value of being still, silent, and allowing the nuances of life to speak its truth. This book from Ryan offers a great example, and here are five of the BIG lessons it provides. 

How To Recognise (+ Overcome) BurnoutNobody is immune to burnout, not in this ridiculously fast-paced world. Yet to an introvert, burnout feels like it’s forever on the tip of your tongue because the things you need to fill up your cup are harder to attain than ever. In this video, we explore a few ways to both recognize (and accept) this, as well as overcome it.

3 actions to take this week

? bookmark this → a wonderful story about how the simple act of walking among nature helped ease the torturous linger of social anxiety. 

? listen to this → an interesting conversation between Ben Greenfield and Ariel Garten (of Muse), exploring some interesting insights into just how the mind works—especially when mediation’s implemented.

? DO THIS → reflect on your relationship with introvert vs extrovert — chances are you don’t fit into one, so the question is… where do you fit on this nuanced spectrum? and are you currently building a life that gives you what you need?

this week’s featured book

Rebirth by Kamal Ravikant — I thought about sharing one of the numerous books aimed at introverts but decided against it because this gem came to mind (a fable, like Beyond The Pale, and one that’s hugely inspired me in recent years).

Kamal’s a fabulous writer, but, more so has a thought-provoking mind that he unleashes with this story sure to have you rethink life wherever you fit on the introvert/extrovert scale. 

If you haven’t picked this up yet, give yourself this gift … I’m sure you’ll adore it.

?️ pass the mic

I have loved watching Nat Eliason’s evolution from standard online writer to philosophical thinker. The way he reads and takes notes—and then shares this with others—is what’s spurred his growth.

But I wish to shine a light on this guy because of his nonchalant and quiet demeanor, and how he still projects such an important message without the need of and in-your-face-charisma. I have nothing but respect for those with a natural gift of the gab, yet I also admire those who can say a lot by saying so little.

? drop the mic

We live in a busy, fast-paced world, my friend. As such, those who are more extroverted and confident to SPEAK UP tend to get the most attention.

They’re often the ones admired and presented as who we should aspire toward.

Yet we are all different, and introverts and extroverts alike (and the nuanced in-between) should be celebrated. I’m about to start work on a script that explores this very topic, so let me know what you would like me to cover…

any questions, feedback, thoughts, and such… hit reply and share ? ?

But before you do, I encourage you to explore this exercise…

Step 1 → think of someone in your life you both admire and feel close to (someone you can trust) BUT who’s the complete opposite in terms of introvert/extrovert.

(ie: if you’re introverted, think of someone extroverted—and vice-versa)

Step 2 → reach out to them and arrange a coffee or call … then, when you chat, explore what life is like for them.

  • What fuels and fills their cup…
  • What they struggle with and the inner questions they ask…
  • How they approach life and strive to overcome obstacles…

As you listen and observe, give them the same gift so they can better understand you and what it’s like navigating the world in your shoes.

The better we understand one another, the better we can care for each other (and support the other in a way that serves them).

I hope you’ve enjoyed this edition of the huddle … if you have, please forward it to a friend who needs to read it & encourage them to subscribe.

and remember to reply and share any questions/thoughts you may have about the “What it’s Like To Be an Introvert” video I’m currently working on.

I strive to make it a valuable resource for both Introverts and Extroverts (and the peeps in-between) so wherever you are on the spectrum, I’d love to hear from you.


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    escape the hustle & stay escaped with actionable anti-hustling advice sent to your inbox every Monday (for free)

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